“She’s so shameless” She’s 22. And was harshly criticized as she danced while her partner was at the hospital… The truth couldn’t be any simpler. They claim the video is a joke, because she always uploads content with her “hubby” to go viral.
I’m a wealth management advisor and I’ve had a few elderly clients in a situation like this.
I remember the most heartbreaking one was a client who was 87 and passed away. He married a woman a 7 years prior that was in her late 30s. She was beautiful, kind, and caring. She took care of him through all of it. Cleaned him and the messes he made, gave him genuine company, and would fuck him whenever he was able (he shared this with me lol).
The kids didn’t do shit for him. Hardly even called or anything. But when he passed they all tried contesting his trust and trying to get her removed from receiving anything. It was a nasty legal battle but thankfully she got her fair share.
It honestly infuriates me when I see people say women like this are taking advantage of the elder man. Most of the time they’re just giving companionship to them when no one else would or did.
When my grandad remarried there were comments about his new wife being in it for the money. By the end I think everyone agreed that if that was the case she sure had earned it.
My father-in-law got remarried about 20 years ago. That woman is a saint. He is awful to her and she is just so wonderful to him. (she's not significantly younger... and I don't think she's a gold-digger, but I think his financial stability was part of her attraction to him).
Despite that, he has had lawyers go over his will to make sure she doesn't see more than the minimal amount (she's there with a minimal amount so she can't sue and say she was forgotten- apparently getting something small protects against that)- but he's giving her the absolute minimum. He wants to make sure his two daughters get everything when he dies.
I personally feel sorry for her, I mean, I guess I benefit if my wife inherits more... but I personally would rather his wife got a fair amount... she works so hard to make life good for him and he gives so little back into that marriage. What's worse is, she has no clue the extensive steps he has taken with lawyers to make sure she doesn't get much.
I mean, this isn't the type of thing you insert yourself in, lots of bad things can come from it.
If you can't communicate something like that without such risks, the more intelligent approach is to support her legally (Many countries will reward her 50%, given the context) or convince your wife to give away part of the inheritance.
Who is going to look afrer her when she is old? Where will she live, get food and healthcare? Let her know so she can decide how to spend theae years abd her efforts. Staying silent and watching is being complicit.
Your wife and her sister aren't good people either. Because you are all aware of his plans, and are allowing that man to treat his wife like garbage, and say nothing. Shameful.
it would probably be less hassle to deal with getting the money and then giving the step-mom a fair share after the dad's death than to approach the dad and get him to rewrite the will. if the dad went out of his way to give the step-mom the minimum so she can't contest it, he's not changing his mind.
If you realize this, and so does your wife, maybe it would be good to have a conversation about giving the FIL's wife a fair share of your wife's inheritance. If you guys aren't struggling, in my head that would be the right thing to do.
This. My mom was not included in any inheritance when her dad and mom passed (they were divorced). Both were successful. My mom's sister got everything when grandma passed, and she sold the house to take her and her entire family (husband, kids, their spouses, grandkids) on a one-month trip to Europe. Didn't even offer anything to my mom. The two sisters are on good terms and always have been. My mom even asked her for some, but the Europe trip needed to be paid for. My mom was so hurt, first, to be left out of the will, and second, to have her sister not even offer anything. In the meantime, my 89-year-old mom is still working to this day. Her sister has never worked and has always been taken care of by a husband.
That's my step grandma. 40 years younger and has been with him for 20 and as far as anyone is concerned she loves him and cares for him like nobody else would.
My Grandad remarried a Philippino lady 30+ years his junior, when he was in his mid 70's. He moved out of his home that he owned, into her home where she took care of him until he died aged 83.
Everything my Grandad had was split 3 ways, between my Mum, her sibling and my Grandad’s wife.
She earned every penny over the 8 years they were together.
I would say in the cases where the difference in age is this great, it’s probably most of the time. The old timers know what’s up. They’re old, not stupid.
Plenty of them are losing their capacity. That's a nice story you shared, but i usually see the opposite. Lady in her 30s getting engaged to an 80 year old she met on a cruise the week they got back from the cruise. We brought her in and told her about the trust we set up for his grandkids with all the money other than m monthly pension payments. Plenty to live on while he's alive, but it wasn't enough for her retirement. They weren't engaged the next week.
As much as this grosses me out on some level, I think it's very common.
ESPECIALLY because people now move all the way across the country from their aging parents and never come back nor want to move the parent in with them when the time comes. It's all "Why should I have to do X?" now with a lot of people. You can't swing a cat without hitting somebody who insists old folks should just get out and find new friends.
Then they show up for the will and find out mom or dad had a new best friend when they all decided they were too busy to even call.
I would say statistically one is more likely to be financially abused by a family member than getting honey potted, [citation needed] at least this was you don't get exploited by family and get to see boobies occasionally.
exactly often these are realy expensive good looking nurse/therapist with benefits. They deserve a bit more respect for giving the geezers a good time before they drop dead.
Just depends on the situation, I'm sure in some of them both parties are realistic about what's going on, and there's nothing wrong with a relationship like this having some more practical or less love-centric motivations.
Likewise, I'm sure in many of these relationships there's likely a lot of dishonesty about the motivations, from both directions even. Just as much as I'd wonder how many of them the younger person expresses dishonest affection, I'd wonder how many times the older person made practical promises that they don't follow through with.
In the end, it's openly communicating boundaries and expectations like adults that dictates whether it's problematic, like with any close relationship
People abandon the elderly in the last like 10 - 20 years of their life. But 10 - 20 years is insanely long to be abandoned. Even the gap of 95 - 100 is going to make a human go nuts from loneliness.
Take care of your elderly allllllll the way. Right to the finish line. Or don't be surprised if they soured on you in the half decade since you were there.
Mmmm...I will say that sometimes the reason they're abandoned is because of their own actions.
For example, my grandmother has more or less been abandoned by all but 2 people. Of those two, one stands to inherit her land (with everyone else's blessing) and the other has stayed so far because of a self imposed sense of obligation that is, from what they've said, starting to wear very thin in the face of how my grandmother continues to act.
So while, yes, you shouldn't just abandon someone because of age - you also can't be surprised to *be* abandoned if you don't treat the people in your life well.
Ya totally agree. But then in addition, we gotta all admit that sometimes assholes deserve to be abandoned, sometimes the folks doing the abandoning end up also rightfully with nothing, and someone can swoop in last minute and charm the money out of the old asshole.
What kills me is when kids act entitled to their parents assets, it's not your money and they can do whatever they want with it. I see so many posts on aging parents where people are worried about their windfall. Go make your own money ffs.
I think most of the time you're right, but there are a couple of nuances to it that can sometimes sway things.
At least around me, the parents generation is the lucky ones that are benefitting from selling off the farmland for rent and oil rights. They are getting multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars by being the generation to liquidate multiple generations of assets slowly built up by last family members. They are also cutting off a constant income stream that's paid out for decades in favor of a lump sum payment.
I don't think it's unreasonable to be a bit disgruntled at watching your parents throw away multiple generations of wealth and a future income stream that you could've eventually benefitted from just so they can get a big payout during their lifetime and then also spend all of it so you get nothing.
Well, I have some personal story to share, related to this point of view. Feel free to ignore it, as it is a lot of text. I guess I just felt triggered and wanted to write a bit about it because it is a sensitive topic for me, so it is kind of like doing therapy in a sense, lol.
I live in Argentina. Cultural middle class, economically poor, in an already third world country. So to understand the economic setup.
My father, a pretty talented artist that never wanted to sell his art or try to live of it (or anything else, really, as he never had a single job), alcoholic and violent against my mom and me, and economically dependent on her and my grandmother, left the country on 2006 and never came back.
He never had a job: he was basically maintained by my grandmother who burned through her life savings sending he money over 13 years, until she died in 2019. She died a month after her husband (who was not my grandfather, and had no kids) who had some money, so when my grandmother died, my father inherited both her husband's wealth and hers. Which was not absolute, forever life changing money I guess: around 300k USD. But for someone who used to live paycheck to paycheck like me or my mom, with no way of picturing savings, it was A LOT OF MONEY. Like, we could buy a house and be sure we could always have a roof over our heads- which is life changing, given we had a history of economic struggles, even living in the streets for some time. You know, it is a big deal.
Between my grandmother's passing until last year when he passed away at 63, -due to his terrible life style: alcohol, cigarettes and partially living in the streets- he sold a house and wasted all the actionable money and more that was inherited (around 160k) all up to the last penny on hotels, alcohol and restaurant meals (and probably gambling), until he was left with nothing (at least nothing he could immediately use, there was a big chunk of the wealth in bonds that are due for 2030) and started threatening my aunt (his sister) for more money, which she hadn't much, so she started to take debt on his behalf just to keep him calm.
One of the houses wasn't sold (for bureaucratic reasons- it was a complicated inheritance due to the assets being distributed across three countries), so when he died, half of it was the only thing left for me (the other half belongs to my aunt), aside from the bonds.
He didn't want to be a father, he didn't want to make his own money, and he really, really tried to make sure that the only small generational wealth I could have was completely and utterly wasted in his vice. Technically it was his money. Technically I was his son and he didn't give a shit for 27 years too, though, as he did not answer for any of his responsibilities, so I guess he kind of owed me something, at least.
So a few years before he passed away I had a discussion with my aunt in which she said exactly what you're saying, when I asked her not to sell one of the houses (as she had half of it, him having the other half): it's his money and he can do whatever he wants with it.
Yeah, well, that's kind of legalestically true, yeah. He was also a completely absent father, both emotionally and economically, which is also illegal. How do we measure the social obligations there?
As terrible as this sounds, I was lucky he died before he could waste the rest.
He served as an example of what not to be though. I studied, got a job that can pay my bills and allows me to think about buying my own place in a few years. I was really lucky, though. Could've been a lot more difficult.
But I could've had it a lot easier if he wasn't an absent father. And part of one's responsibility as a father is trying to make your own kids' life easier... I mean, you chose to have them.
So, to the point I was trying to make: I hope you see why I felt entitled to part of his money. He didn't earn it through his work, and he was already in debt with me as his neglected son... And it was life changing money (moreover when I had the discussion with my aunt, I was still studying and didn't have a clear economic present or future ahead of me).
I guess you were talking about a lot more frivolous people, which makes total sense. But idk just wanted to share a related story
I have a family member in a similar scenario. What his younger partner is doing to take care of him changed everyone’s mind about her. When he passes she’ll get whatever he left to her with no argument and if he left nothing to her then the kids will make it right.
the way people fall for OF models and their advertising skits is fucking wild.... I thought people would be smarter, but every day, we're shown how dumb most people are...
But there was a clip that popped up a lot for me where a girl, I can't remember her name, but she's a blonde and goes on and on about her "giant cherries" even though she isn't "well endowed".
She claimed she was "visiting" a subscriber of hers who "once sent her $35,000 in one month". The guy used one of those scooters to get around. He played the part of being an old pervert.
Then a few days later, I saw him pop up in a sketch of that dentist guy who like watches and makes fun of all the viral clips, like the one where they have a bottle of whiskey and an apple and hidden behind the apple is like $1000 - the "hook" is that "if the homeless person picks the apple, they get $1000. If they pick the bottle they get nothing".
Anyway, he was acting totally normal, in other words not needing a scooter for assitance.
There is no reason he couldn't be both a creep and a social media actor. But I have the feeling these are people that work together just to try and rage bait people.
I'm not sure, but it isn't the first time I've seen someone pop up in a "random video where they just met" and then they show up again months later in another video.
Dude this IG model literally does this with all types of different people, places and things. She's a 1000% in the Ragebait game. When I saw her face and the bs engagement title I knew I would have to scroll to find your comment. Unfortunately this will get like 45k upvotes on this post lmfao.
Not even an IG model. An OF thot. Last time this was posted someone put her name, I think Aurora something I can't remember, she has videos getting banged by BBCs and all. It's an ad.
Damn bro that's wild But it doesn't really surprise me tbh. They've crept in even into the art subs that I'm part of. Women will come on there and be like oh what do you think My art? (The art piece will be stolen from someone else) When you click on their profile it will be them taking the D and linking to an OF account. It's annoying and really becoming a problem. You have to also be careful that you don't point it out in a post. I did that once and I got Permaban because apparently they are "people with feelings" or some shit...
How dare you point out that OF “model” isn’t an artist!!! They simply use a different medium than traditional art. It’s an additive process instead of subtractive if you will.
I don't know, I have a friend (she was 22 at the time) that had a rich, very old, dude giving her money for going on dates with him. She was very confused when she found out he did not want (or could not?) bang.
He ended up buying her a car and gave her significant money, then he died 5 years later. I think he did not have a family and felt lonely, who knows.
Look I have a grandpa who married young. They both get what they wanted out of the deal. I fought it a long time but now I see that he isn’t alone and they are both happy. Gotta let it go.
If he likes it, I love it. I would never feel sorry for a grown man, that chooses someone a fraction of his age. He knows exactly what he is signing up for and it's not love.
Every couple of weeks someone posts the meme about the old dude that basically was terminal or something and blew all his remaining money pretending to be rich, married a young gold digger who then found out upon death he was broke.
I knew a waitress who married an extremely wealthy older man. If I’m not mistaken in his late 80’s.
She would make sure he was asleep early and throw huge parties at the house. He bought her a brand new Mercedes tons of expensive clothes and jewelry. She went on trips all over the world.
In return all he wanted was to watch her with other men.
When he passed away she wasn’t in his will. Everything he bought was in his company’s name. That was now in his daughter’s name.
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